I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
