For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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