is your mom at the bar?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
