Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
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I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
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I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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