i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize