Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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