new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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