Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
