Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
