Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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