I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize