Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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