We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
