I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
