So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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