i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
