Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
