I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
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