If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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