The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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