He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize