BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
