grandma shit on top of the toilet
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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