there was a trapeze. enough said
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize
