She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize