Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.