NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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