toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
