Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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