i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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