Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
