Duck Duck Cougar?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize