it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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