Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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