I'm lost and stupid without you.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
