S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
