you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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