I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Operation Purity has been aborted
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize