new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
