It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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