its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
