Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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