Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
