k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize