Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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