what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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