Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
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WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
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You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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