I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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