If that was your dad, he is hot
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
zippers are such a cool invention
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize