it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
