I must be too annoying 4 u.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize