id be glad to
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
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